How to Make Love in a Wheelchair

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Sex tips and sex positions for people with disabilities and wheelchair users.

An interabled couple cuddle on the beach, with a woman sitting on a man's lap in a wheelchair.

Making love in a wheelchair can be a fulfilling and enjoyable experience for individuals with disabilities and their partners.

Remember, communication is often considered the most important factor in a good sex life for anyone. It’s also needed so you can set the scene for a comfortable and safe experience. Being able to communicate openly and honestly with your partner about your needs and boundaries before and during lovemaking will ensure your pleasure and wellbeing.

Below we share tips on how to make love in a wheelchair compiled from people with disabilities, interabled lovers, and health experts.

Interabled couple on having a sexual relationship

An interabled couple show how it is possible to make love in a wheelchair, in a fully clothed demo with supports and pillows.
A real-life interabled couple on YouTube gives a safe-for-work demonstration on how to make love in a wheelchair. Source: YouTube/Heidi Herkes

Heidi Herkes is a wheelchair user who became paralyzed from the chest down after an accident. On her style and beauty YouTube channel, she gave sex tips and visual demos of sexual positions for interabled couples.

In one of her videos, Heidi demonstrates sex positions with her partner of more than a decade, an able-bodied man who does some lifting. The couple also shows foreplay and sex positions involving Heidi’s wheelchair and how to make love in a wheelchair with sex pillow supports— all while fully clothed.

Related Read: The Best Sex Chairs for Disabled Adults

Tips on how to make love in a wheelchair

An illustration shows a white version of the handicap symbol, a person in a wheelchair, with a pink human figure in straddling their lap. The background is black.

  • Prepare for your comfort. Do what you need to do so that you and your partner are comfortable and relaxed. This may involve finding a comfortable position for both of you, and making sure that any medical equipment or assistive devices are out of the way.
  • Communication is key when it comes to making love in a wheelchair. Talk with your partner about your needs and boundaries, and be open and honest about any challenges or limitations you may face.
  • Consider using assistive devices or positioning aids to help make the experience more comfortable and enjoyable. For example, pillows or wedges can be used to support certain body parts, and straps or harnesses can be used to help position the body.
  • Take your time and go at a pace that is comfortable for both you and your partner. Remember that making love is not a race, and that the most important thing is to enjoy the experience and connect with your partner.
  • Finally, don’t be afraid to ask for help or a break if you need it. If you are not comfortable or are experiencing any pain, it’s important to let your partner know and rest if necessary.

Overall, making love in a wheelchair can be a fulfilling and enjoyable experience with the right communication and preparation. By being open and honest with your partner, taking the necessary steps to ensure comfort and safety, and being patient and understanding, you can have a positive and rewarding experience.

More sex positions for interabled couples

In a bid to become more sexually inclusive, Cosmopolitan began upping its editorial game.

For decades, the women’s magazine had shared sex tips to readers hoping to heat up their intimate lives. The ongoing editorial pressure to share more and juicier tidbits was likely behind the more questionably dolling out the infamous oral sex tip involving a glazed donut.

In 2018, the magazine published an article written by Sarah Alexander-Georgeson, in which she shared “9 things wheelchair users want you to know about their sex lives.”

Number five:

WHEELCHAIR USERS ARE ATTRACTIVE; YOU’RE NOT WEIRD FOR FANCYING US
People are attracted to others for various reasons. It could be their looks, their intellect, their personality, or a variety of things – and that doesn’t stop because we use wheels instead of legs. There’s nothing wrong with fancying a wheelchair user, why would there be? We have so much to offer, and at the end of the day, you’ll be shagging me, not my wheelchair.

In 2019, the magazine published two articles by Jill Hamilton featuring visual illustrations of how to make love in a wheelchair.

The best part? The recommended sex positions for people with disabilities were suggested by actual wheelchair users and one of their lovers!

RELATED READ: Disabled Performers in Adult Films Show All Bodies Are Beautiful

The articles also display a few supportive sex positions some people may be able to try without their wheelchairs. Yet that both include visual representations of sex in a wheelchair helps squash the stigma associated with disability, sexuality, and assistive devices.

You can view the illustrations on how to make love in a wheelchair, created by Lucie Caron at the article links below. They show that wheelchairs can, in fact, be very sexy!

Wheelchair sex positions

Need tips on how to receive oral sex from a wheelchair? Astroglide recommends various sex positions for disabled adults, including this one:

Wheelchair users can enjoy giving oral sex from a seated position, with their partner reclining on a bed or other surface in front of them and placing the lower half of their body on the wheelchair user’s lap.

Related Read: Study Reveals the Best Sex Positions for Back Pain

Friendly for your disability?

Most of the suggested poses for couples appear to be for interabled couples, meaning one has a physical disability while the other is able-bodied. Let’s hope we see a wider range of ideas in the future!

To be clear, the sex positions depicted won’t be suitable for all people with disabilities, let alone all people who use wheelchairs. It’s great to see some representations of body diversity, as well as poses for solo and same-sex experiences.

Yet before attempting any of the poses, make sure you’ve assessed what you and your partner may need in order to ensure a sex position is both pleasurable and safe.

Listen to the advice of Sins Invalid, a disability justice-based performance group: it’s crucial to explore which positions are friendly for your disability.

Image source: M-SUR/Shutterstock